Join us today and learn that no matter how old you are, Moms, you play a special roll in your children’s hearts, maybe more foundational, more influential than anyone else.  And you will always have a special place in our hearts from the time we’re born to the time we die. Take that responsibility seriously by being a Godly mom.

May 12, 2024

1 Samuel 1:5-28

“A Godly Mom”

by Ben Caldwell

I once read a quote from Billy Graham. In this quote he said, “MY mother didn’t believe that Mother’s Day should be a time of self congratulations – rather it should be a day of soul searching, so that moms might gain a new awareness of the vital roll God has given them in the home, in their children, and in the nation.”

That sounds like good advice, and I certainly don’t think I am as good a parent at Billy Graham’s folks, but maybe today would be a good day to challenge moms AND to ALSO to celebrate you!  So this morning we have sought both to pat you on the back and to challenge you moms.

I hope that today this message is not just a challenge to mothers, it is a challenge to us all, whether you have children or not. So let this be a challenge to you in parenting your biological children, your adopted children, or your spiritual children. Maybe this will even help you to help your friends and neighbors.

Our scripture passage for this morning is 1 Samuel 1:5 and following.

Did you know that we have problems in our world? Political polarization, the Israel-Hamas war, College protests, anti-semitism or acts of genocide, break-down in the family here in the U.S. A racial divide. But over all the problems that we face socially and politically… and personally…

Let me suggest that we have a bigger problem here in the U.S., a spiritual problem. Here is an illustration: In case you are not familiar with the Great Commission, it is found in Matthew 28:18-20. It is a directive, a command that Jesus gives to all of his followers at the end of his ministry. These are very significant words to everyone who considers themselves Christians. Let me read it to you:

Matthew 28:18 Then Jesus came to them and said, “All authority in heaven and on earth has been given to me. 19 Therefore go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, 20 and teaching them to obey everything I have commanded you. And surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age.”

So, I’m reading this book on Discipleship; it’s called Replicate by Robby Gallaty and Chris Swain. They cite a study in which church-goers were polled. These church-going people were asked about the Great Commission.

And 51% of church-goers said they had not heard of the Great Commission. 25% of church goers have heard of it, but could not recall the exact meaning of it. And 6% said they weren’t sure if they had ever heard of it or not. That’s 82% of people who go to church don’t know what God expects them to do.

So here is where I am going with all this. God sent Jesus to help us. To love us. To make us whole. Jesus’ command to us is to teach people. He says to each of us, “Go make disciples.” And we have completely dropped the ball in terms of being part of the solution to the world’s problems.

Now, moms, I am not aiming this at you. I’m talking to the whole church. Success as a mother or a parent or a friend or whoever you are comes from being faithful to do what God asks you to do. And as each of us obeys or disobeys God, we are either helping our families or hurting them. We are either helping Newport News or hurting it. We are either helping this country or failing it.

Right now you might be thinking, Ben you are really over the top. Well, I don’t think I am. What I’m saying is: you have a place of influence where only you can make a difference. That might be with your kids or your friends or your coworkers or grandkids… or whoever. But the GREATEST of all commands is to love the Lord your God with all of your heart, soul, mind, and strength. And we’re not doing that. Why? I don’t know. Its difficult or messy or uncomfortable. But we are failing to lead even our children to Jesus. Maybe you just don’t know how.

Well, as your pastor, I say its time to make a change. Maybe I have failed to teach you in the last year and a half how to do this. I am committed to changing that. And I am telling you all this, because I believe in you. I know God is clearly working among you. He is changing things here already. And together if we invest ourselves in the things the HE says are important, then we will lead people closer to Jesus one relationship at a time. Are you with me in this? Or are you content to stand back and watch our family members destroy themselves? The choice is yours.

The book of 1 Samuel begins with a geneology of a man named Elkanah.  And it tells us he has two wives:  Penninah who has children and Hannah, who does not. 1 Samuel tells us that every year this family journeyed to a town called Shiloh to make a special offering to the Lord.  The dad, Elkanah, provided portions of meat for everyone in his family for them to offer to the Lord.  And verse 5 says:

5 But to Hannah he gave a double portion because he loved her, and the LORD had closed her womb.

In Old Testament days, when this passage was written, your family line was very important. God had chosen the Israelites as His special people, so the family line was the primary way that God passed down his blessings. For a woman in those days to deal with infertility was considered shameful; not only did they struggle with the same feelings of wanting children and not being able to have them that some couples deal with today, but they also faced a kind of social shame. The shame was so great that a woman would share her husband’s affection with another woman, just so he could have children.  That doesn’t mean that polygamy is good, I just want you to understand their thinking. It is possible that Elkanah married Hannah for love, but he married Peninnah because Hannah couldn’t have children.

1 Samuel 1: 6 And because the LORD had closed her womb, her rival kept provoking her in order to irritate her. 7 This went on year after year. Whenever Hannah went up to the house of the LORD, her rival provoked her till she wept and would not eat.

This is not a commentary on how God allowed polygamy, if anything, it seems to point to the dysfunction found in that kind of relationship. Obviously Hannah and Peninnah had an adversarial relationship. I believe Peninnah probably has a kind of secondary status. Like she was the second wife, not the first. Or maybe Elkanah loved Hannah more, but whatever the reasons, Peninnah was trying to hurt Hannah. She would pick on Hannah and pick on her and pick on her till she cried and refused to eat. I think we all know a bully when we see one, and that is what is happening here.

Now, you should know that in John 9, Jesus and his followers encounter a blind man, and his disciples ask, “Why is this guy blind? Who sinned, him or his parents?” And Jesus responds “Neither, this happened so that the works of God might be displayed in him.” If you are struggling with infertility, maybe you are asking yourself, did I do something wrong? Why won’t God give us children? If that describes you, let me say: Maybe God has something that He is trying to do through you. I don’t know that God will or will not give you children, but I can tell you, I believe God loves you, and He isn’t holding some secret sin against you.

1 Samuel 1: 8 Elkanah her husband would say to her, "Hannah, why are you weeping? Why don't you eat? Why are you downhearted? Don't I mean more to you than ten sons?"

Oh, my word! Elkanah, what are you doing?  Don’t you just feel for him? I mean he knows all the wrong things to say, but he can’t seem to find the right things. Or maybe, he is trying to use humor to cheer her up; I don’t know. And… even though Elkanah seems to loveHannah, he doesn’t seem to know what is going onbetween his wives. It doesn’t look like Hannah told her husband that her depression was because of the way Peninnah was treating her.

1SA 1:9 Once when they had finished eating and drinking in Shiloh, Hannah stood up. Now Eli the priest was sitting on a chair by the doorpost of the LORD's temple. 10 In bitterness of soul Hannah wept much and prayed to the LORD. 11 And she made a vow, saying, "O LORD Almighty, if you will only look upon your servant's misery and remember me, and not forget your servant but give her a son, then I will give him to the LORD for all the days of his life, and no razor will ever be used on his head."

In these verses we see: Hannah is

DETERMINED TO HELP HER CHILD BECOMEGOD’S SERVANT.

I am not saying that you have to make a special vow to God.  I am not saying that godly parents have children who are pastors or priests.  I am not even saying that your children will always turn out right if you are godly.  Sometimes godly parents do everything right, and their children still rebel.  What I am saying is that godly parents diligently try to pass on to their children a love for and a desire to serve God.

In New York City, a woman had been moving from doctor to doctor, describing this terrible feelings of anxiety and pain.  The doctors would give her a thorough examination and yet could find nothing wrong with her.  One wise old doctor examined her and then talked with her about her ailments.  He told her emphatically that he had the answer to her dilemma.  He wrote on a prescription tablet:  “Do something nice for someone else every day for fourteen days in a row and come back and see me.”  He handed her the prescription and said “That’ll be $150, pay on your way out.”

The woman looked at the prescription.  “$150 for what!?!  You haven’t given me any medication!” she said.  The doctor replied, “Lady, that advice is the best medication in the world; if it’s wrong, I’ll give you your money back.”

Though a little put out, the woman tried the doctor’s prescription.  Intending to prove that old doctor wrong, that very night she baked some cookies and delivered them to the apartment of a lonely senior citizen.  The next day she helped another person do some shopping.  She volunteered at her church, ran errands, wrote kind notes, made phone calls of encouragement, and every day she chose to do something nice for someone else.  Fourteen days later, she walked into the doctor’s office and gave that old doctor… a hug.  She said, “I am a new person—healthier, happier and more content than ever, and the pain is gone.  Thanks for placing some good old-fashioned common sense on your prescription pad.”

In our “ME-First” society, we miss the paradox of servanthood.  People become unlovable when they seek love.  Yet, when we give love, we become lovable and (to some extent) happy.  Self-centered people are basically unhappy; other-centered people are basically happy.  Jesus put it like this:  12 For whoever exalts himself will be humbled, and whoever humbles himself will be exalted (MATTHEW 23:12).

If we teach our kids to seek God first, they are assured to find Him and to have all their needs taken care of (Matthew 6:33).

More than just being well adjusted in the here and now, don’t you want your children to gain eternal life, a right standing with God.  Jesus said so what if you have everything the world offers, but you lose your soul?  What good is that? (Matthew 16:26) And Jesus asks “Where is your treasure?” Is it found in earthly temporary things that won’t matter in the long run? Or is it on heavenly eternal things that really matter? Think about where your treasures are.

A GODLY MOTHER IS DETERMINED TO HELP HER CHILDREN BECOME SERVANTS OF GOD.  What greater legacy is there???

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1SA 1:12 As she kept on praying to the LORD, Eli observed her mouth. 13 Hannah was praying in her heart, and her lips were moving but her voice was not heard. Eli thought she was drunk 14and said to her, "How long will you keep on getting drunk? Get rid of your wine."

She is so into her prayer time… so emphatically gesturing, that the priest thinks she has a little alcohol buzz going. In verse 15, she answers:

1SA 1:15 "Not so, my lord," Hannah replied, "I am a woman who is deeply troubled. I have not been drinking wine or beer; I was pouring out my soul to the LORD. 16 Do not take your servant for a wicked woman; I have been praying here out of my great anguish and grief."     1SA 1:17 Eli answered, "Go in peace, and may the God of Israel grant you what you have asked of him."  1SA 1:18 She said, "May your servant find favor in your eyes." Then she went her way and ate something, and her face was no longer downcast.

In her time of grief, in her time of need Hannah relies on God; she pours her heart out to God. What we are seeing is:

Hannah’s DEPENDANCE ON GOD.

You may say, “Hang on a minute, Ben.  Hannah is not a mother yet.”  Well true, but it is because of her dependence on the Lord that God sees fit to make her a mother.

That is the power of prayer!!!  We don’t change God; He is unchanging.  As we pray and seek God’s face, we are changed, SOMETIMES to the point that God sees us as ready to have our requests granted.  But the key here is that as we pray we become more dependant on God.

When my kids were younger, they weren’t a lot of trouble. They were pretty well behaved. But I want to tell you about a time when they weren’t so well-behaved.  My children were 5 years old, 3, and 2.  Now envision with me a trip to Wal-mart gone wrong.  Leslie had several things on her shopping list, so I am going to take the kids while she shops. We’ve been at Wal-mart a while, got some things in our cart, and it’s about time to meet Leslie.  So the kids are antsey.  They’ve been riding in the cart and their done with that.  Now they want to get down for minute.  So I take them out of the cart:  Livie, Adam, and Eric.  Livie says, “Daddy I gotta go to the bathroom.”  “Honey, we’ve got a cart full of stuff, can it wait a minute?”  “No, daddy, I gotta go NOW!”  OK, where’s Eric?  My 2 year old is gone, nowhere to be seen.  And Adam is now playing in the middle of rack of clothes.  “Adam, come here.  Where is Eric.”  “I dunno.”  Well, get out of that rack we gotta find him, before you mother gets here.”  “But daddy, I gotta pee,” Livie whines.  So now I’m dragging Livie by her arm, and she’s whinning. And I’m dragging Adam by the other and he’s repeating over and over, “Daddy can I tell you something?  Daddy can I tell you something?  Daddy, can I tell you something?”  “Just wait a minute Livie and stop that whinning, when we find Eric, we’ll take you to the bath room.  Now, Adam, what do you want?  Eric’s back there in that clothes rack I was in.”  Whew.  So we get him, take Livie to the bathroom, and I let Adam play in the clothes for minute before Leslie shows up.  And whew we’re outta there.

Now contrast that, to when we go to the pool. At those same ages, none of my kids could swim on their own.  So they would cling to me.  “Daddy, can we please go over there?  Daddy, can we jump off the side to you?  One says, “Daddy, I have to go to the bathroom?”  And the others say, “Daddy can we come, too?”

What is the difference?  Dependence.  At Wal-mart, they want to be independent.  They want to go off on their own.  They don’t think they need dear old dad.  At the pool, they have learned, on my own I sink.  But with Daddy near by I can do all kinds of cool stuff… They are model kids, at the pool, because they know they need me.

How are you helping your children see their need for Jesus?  I DON’T KNOW.  How do I do that?  You model it for them.  YOU SHOW THEM THAT YOU NEED JESUS, AND YOU TEACH THEM THAT WE ALL DO.  We are all sinners, that is we all do things wrong and hurt the people around us.  Without Jesus, the payment for our sin is death.  With Jesus we receive life.  Don’t put on a façade, your kids will see right through it… no matter what age they are. Your adult children also need to know that you aren’t perfect. No one can relate to “perfection”; be real and genuine with your kids.  Show them that you need Jesus just as much as anyone, and when they really do feel a need for him, they will already know how to depend on Jesus, because they saw it in your life.

A GODLY MOTHER IS AN EXAMPLE OF DEPENDANCE UPON THE LORD.

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1SA 1:19 Early the next morning they arose and worshiped before the LORD and then went back to their home at Ramah. Elkanah lay with Hannah his wife, and the LORD remembered her. 20 So in the course of time Hannah conceived and gave birth to a son. She named him Samuel, saying, "Because I asked the LORD for him."   1SA 1:21 When the man Elkanah went up with all his family to offer the annual sacrifice to the LORD and to fulfill his vow,22 Hannah did not go. She said to her husband, "After the boy is weaned, I will take him and present him before the LORD, and he will live there always."  1SA 1:23 "Do what seems best to you," Elkanah her husband told her. "Stay here until you have weaned him; only may the LORD make good his word." So the woman stayed at home and nursed her son until she had weaned him.

What does he mean, “only may the LORD make good his word”?  Elkanah is referring back to verse 17.  He and Hannah believe Eli’s words are straight from God.  Basically Eli said, “May God give you what you asked for.” And they are taking it to mean: God is doing for you what you asked. So do what you told Him you would do.” So Elkanah is blessing Hannah’s plan for their son:  May God let our son serve as a priest in Shiloh all of his life.  And She very likely prayed that God would give her CHILDREN. So there would be a hope for future children as well.

1SA 1:24 After he was weaned, she took the boy with her, young as he was, along with a three-year-old bull, an ephah of flour and a skin of wine, and brought him to the house of the LORD at Shiloh. 25When they had slaughtered the bull, they brought the boy to Eli, 26and she said to him, "As surely as you live, my lord, I am the woman who stood here beside you praying to the LORD. 27 I prayed for this child, and the LORD has granted me what I asked of him. 28 So now I give him to the LORD. For his whole life he will be given over to the LORD." And he worshiped the LORD there.

Hannah is CONFIDENTLY LETTING GO OF HER CHILD.

Every parent’s job is to help their children grow to a place where he or she can stand on their own two feet.  And in Christ we want our children to not just stand on their own, but to have God’s solid foundation to stand on.

Ezekiel 18 tells us we can’t say, “The fathers eat sour grapes, and the children's teeth are set on edge.”  What that means is: we are all responsible directly to God for our own behavior.  So parents, we have to be preparing our children to stand alone before God and give an accounting of their lives. Now, most of us aren’t going to let our kids go at 3 years old, like Hannah, but we look ahead to a day when have to let go and trust God to take care of them. There is an old proverb that says, “You can give a man a fish and feed him for a day, or you can teach a man to fish and feed him for a life-time.”  Which do you want for your children?  Are you making sure they come to church, or are you instilling in them a love for God that will ensure their growth tomorrow?  Are you helping them come to a place where they seek the Lord for themselves?

Maybe you are asking, “How do I do that, Ben?” A good place to begin is by personally plugging into a Bible study and a ministry. Here at Orcutt we are committed to some Core biblical values.  One of those is Discipleship.  We are committed to helping you and your children grow deep in the Lord, so that when that day of accounting comes, each of us may stand confidently before our God and say, “I am not worthy to come into the kingdom of heaven, but Jesus is.  And I stand today… in HIM.” Or maybe not on the last day, but maybe tomorrow, when that day of difficulty comes, that day when their faith is tested. They will need to know some things about God if they hope to stand. Start seeking now, so they are ready then.

No matter how old you are, Moms, you play a special roll in your children’s hearts, maybe more foundational, more influential than anyone else.  And you will always have a special place in our hearts from the time we’re born to the time we die. Take that responsibility seriously by being a Godly mom.

May you be blessed this Mother’s Day. Know that we love you and honor you today…